One of my favourite books is a small book written by don Miguel Ruiz and it is wisdom literature. The book is called The Four Agreements and to quote the front cover it claims to be A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom and I agree with this claim. There are many books and many different writings that are considered wisdom literature and what is my wisdom lit may not be yours!
I have many books near and dear to my heart that mean something to me as I am sure you can quote some as well. This small book was given to me many years ago, by a wise and trusted friend, as I struggled with some challenges in my life. These four simple philosophies seem so easy and practical however the depths of wisdom they carry take them way beyond the simplicity of their word. The purpose of bringing them to light this week is not to look at all four, but to talk about one of them and how it has shown to bring personal freedom to this writer. The agreement: always do my best!
Most recently, I have been increasing my personal challenges with fitness and running. I have a hunger to push a little harder, a little further and test the waters of what some see as extreme limits to the body, particularly for a woman in her 60’s. When I do so, the quote from Rich Roll comes to mind because I am a person who struggles with finding balance. I have found, over the years, I have little patience for outcome. I jump in with both feet, my hands, my head and my dog if I had one. Over the years I have been known to be impetuous, impulsive and impertinent when I want something. I found myself often in hot water because events could be well underway, the die cast, long before the possibility of challenges caught up! I take on challenges only to see how they unfold as opposed to researching and weighing all the options. This is where The Four Agreements have sat well with me over the years.
In 2007 on a whim, I decided to take a few courses at Laurentian University with a loose future intent in mind. I imagined myself a scholar. A person who never went beyond high school, 33 years after graduation, set my sites on a master’s degree. My imagination took flight and carried me through the next six years and across the stage in front of family and friends. Doing my best, letting go of balance and imagining completion culminated in my graduation.
My desire of late to push the bar when it comes to my fitness has led me to investigate extreme racing after watching a ten-part series on one of the on-demand video websites. The extreme nature of the challenges in this race has sparked a desire to see how far I might be able to push myself. One agreement reminds me to always do my best. I wonder what my best might be in an extreme race in the jungle or desert or scaling a rock face? How far would I go before I would pack it in?
What is our best at any given time? How much discomfort are we willing to endure?
Over the years, since adopting The Four Agreements, I continue to remind myself to always do my best. When I focus on my best I can consistently look back and feel good that I left nothing undone or on the table. When I give my all, it is the best I have to give on any given day and serves to feed my unshakeable desire to let life unfold before me, even though it causes balance to be unreachable.
Part of lacking to seek balance gives room for imagination. When we do our best, jump in with both feet and see where life takes us, we can imagine success at every turn. When we can imagine a successful outcome, our unconscious mind, not knowing a distinction between reality and imagination, takes us on a path to that successful imagining. If we imagine failure then surely as I don’t have a dog, we will fail and then say, “I knew that was going to happen” because we had already imagined it.
The Four Agreements are four statements to guide you to personal freedom and this is only one of the four. Always doing my best has served me well over the years and as I have accomplished many a task through my lack of balance, by just throwing myself in and trusting doing my best would be enough. Running more than 200 km in 30 days was never more than a whim, an idea and an imagining before it was accomplished. Each day I did my best to fulfill what I had imagined is possible, and it worked!
As I continue to grow my scope for the imagination and believe in myself this includes a happy life, post-COVID. I imagine a world-embracing each other again with hugs and handshakes. I know we will come through this time richer and stronger. It is by doing our best, letting go of balance, and imagining good outcomes we will succeed in a post COVID world. May you imagine yourself successful and positive in your future and may you always put your best foot forward. Walt Disney said, “Laughter is timeless, imagination has no age, dreams are forever.” When we laugh as we do our best, imagine a life we want to lead, our dreams will come true and last forever.
Cynthia Breadner is a grief specialist, a soul care worker who offers one-on-one home care for aging adults who choose to age in place. This care includes emotional support, physical care, mental well-being, and spiritual practices to soothe the soul. She is a volunteer at hospice, LTC chaplain and a death doula, assisting with end-of-life for client and family. She is the mother part of the #DanCynAdventures duo and practices fitness, health and wellness in the South Simcoe and North York region. [email protected] breakingstibah.com
