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COLUMN: 'We don't know what we don't know!'

Columnist Cynthia Breadner reflects on growing and learning about herself
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Submitted by Cynthia Breadner

As I grow and learn about myself, I listen to my soul and I find each time I learn and explore I am fascinated. I am always hungry to learn more. Take more courses. Share time in a learning environment and mostly grow to be a more rounded better person. I believe my soul contract is to learn humility and understand deeply that "we don't know what we don't know!" In the landscape of 2020, so much stress and challenge surfaced that troubles people and polarizes conversations. We are all learning how to be in this new world that has surfaced in our 2020 vision. I am feeling fulfilled and satisfied and that surprises me. With all the dissatisfaction in the world how do I manage to stay satisfied?

This morning when I woke up the sun was shining on my face through the window where I watch my tree. You remember my tree. I have told you about it in past writings. The tree is now bare of leaves and so it means the sun can get through to my face as it peeks over the horizon. The interesting part is the sun is in such a different location than it is in June, I was astounded at how this morning that came home to roost. Today, I simply stopped and took notice of the placement of the sun. It is rising so far south and still has another three weeks to go before it will begin its journey back to the north. As I have said before we look at it like the sun moves when in truth it is us, Earth, that makes the journey. The sun stays put.

I went and made a coffee and then took it back to my room and sat in my chair and watched the sunrise. It was awe inspiring and with the clear skies it was so wonderful. I loved every minute of it. I was so thankful and simply joy-filled. I took this moment on this Sunday morning and greeted the sun as it stayed put and I arrived to enjoy it. I took the time to realize how blessed I am. Coffee in hand, warm bed (messy and slept in) beside me, food in my fridge and the peace which passes all understanding was at hand.

Why is that not enough? Why do we search for more than what is right here in our world on any given day in any given moment? As humankind we are never satisfied. Where do we go from here? What will 2021 look like and how do we cope with changing landscape? What does it mean to be prudent and caring for our fellow human beings in a world that is lived out using technology and surfing the world wide web? It has been a long road since February when things began to shut down, slow down, close in and this virus reared its ugly head. Where are the silver linings? After all these months how do we find some hope, peace, joy and love?

There is an origin story from the Hopi Nation:

“I want to hide something from the humans until they are ready for it. It is the realization that they create their own reality.”
The Eagle said,
“Give it to me. I will take it to the moon.”
The Creator said,
“No. One day they will go there and find it.”
The Salmon said,
“I will bury it on the bottom of the ocean.”
The Creator said,
“No. They will go there, too.”
The Buffalo said,
“I will bury it on the Great Plains.”
The Creator said,
“They will cut into the skin of the earth and find it even there.”
Grandmother who lives in the breast of Mother Earth, and who has no physical eyes but sees with spiritual eyes, said,
“Put it inside of them.”
And the Creator said,
“It is done.”

- Creation story from the Hopi Nation, Arizona

We find it within! That is my 2021 mantra: “I am satisfied”. Simple. I choose to realize at any minute, any day, I am satisfied. May you feel satisfied as you seek to find that which satisfies you. May you find satisfaction in your day. May you feed yourself with all that will create satisfaction and may you rest in the satisfaction of your peace.

Cynthia Breadner is a grief specialist and bereavement counsellor, a soul care worker and offers one-on-one homecare for aging adults who choose to age in place. This care includes emotional support, physical care, mental well-being, and spiritual practices to sooth the soul. She is a volunteer at hospice, LTC chaplain and a death doula, assisting with end-of-life care for client and family. She is the mother part of the #DanCynAdventures duo and practices fitness, health and wellness in the South Simcoe and North York region. CynthiaBreadner@gmail.com breakingstibah.com